last day of october

To wrap up everything for this month,

i think that this month is full of ups and downs in overall.

things that happen in this month,

got my self a new laptop Compaq Presario CQ42, to replace the previous 1 that got nasty... =/

enroll myself into Taylor's UWE - Accounting and Finance, overall what i see is that the total of girls > boys... but strangely that my group/class that actually has the most boys and less girls...whereas other group/class are like even or girls>boys ?

adapting to the new group, though got quite few that i had already know from foundation.

other than that, i'm stressed out for no specific reason or unidentified reasons.

in this first year which consist of Term 1 + Term 2 and 6 subjects, which is Intro to finance accounting, intro to management accounting, business statistic & decision making, business information system management, economics for business & accounting, and management & organization behavior.

puff ~ feel like gona stressed out in this 1st year and half dead by sec year and died by third year, and when into the world = become undead.

got a bit not happy with my land lord, which typically she has this 大小姐脾气

and she keeps on sms to me on every month end to remind or should say rush me to bank in the rental, but the point is the rental will be banked in on every last day of the month.. ok ?? why the XXXX that she need to keep on disturbing me... gosh ! almost every month end mood got messed up by her...

got my self applied for PTPTN loan, now need to get a whole sack of document that need to be sign and prepared. so that can hand in by the time when the officer go to the campus.. ?! cross hand, hope every things go smoothly~

messed up my system, which now i can't actually differentiate wants and need.

but for my aim, i'm sure that i going to go for DSLR for the 1st and next is to get myself a blackberry

=)

last but not least, yesterday went to Sunway Giza Tao for dinner as to celebrate Ching Huei birthday. the not good part is that i got over hungry which cause me had not very good appetite to consume tons of food, which actually make that day sad for me. but still i'm still happy to get into the chit chats when eating and all the celebration...

and also wish her all the best for taking SPM in november...

less than 2 hours, got to welcome november and put the month of october into the back of my memories where all secrets and the detailed stuff be buried into the locked memories.

hope that november will be a fresh month and a waits challenges a head.

About my Uni

Do you guys know that smoking in some area are prohibited such as:

(under the Control of Tobacco Product Regulations, 2004, Clause 11 : No person shall smoke in any area in an educational institution or a higher educational institution. Any person who contravenes sub regulation (1) commits an offence and shall on conviction be liable to a fine not exceeding ten thousand ringgit or toimprisonment for a term not exceeding two years).

[this was extracted from Taylor's portal]

regarding about this,

first, if the commercial block/area is also in the University campus. I think that they should also imply that the area is also prohibited to smoke. But sadly that's not the case, where students are actually allow to smoke at that area. Which i do found it quite strange.

second, though Taylor's are smart that they install CCTV at all the corridor or walk way so that it will be under surveillance. Somehow, students are much more smarter as all the stairs, emergency stairs and toilet aren't under the surveillance. So they manage to smoke at those area which Taylor's can't actually controlled.

p/s: I had no intension to inflame smokers/student's/public on this matter.

SNSD - Hoot

basic english sub by Soshified

x)

as if i am smiling towards you

because you can't see i'm crying

as tears aren't rolling down

as tears dried up

as there isn't watery eyes are shown;

as there is a mask to cover up the sad face with a smiling mask

you would never know that i am sad beneath the mask

as there is even a crack in the heart

but you can't see it because the heart is inside me

as you are not able to see through and never notice about it.

don't think that you knew me well,

as i myself never knew myself

because of all those layer of mask that are worn one above another

till i can't trace back the one, the original me long time ago.

just checked my gmail,

and found out that my application is approved but still need to prepare

a lump sum of document to hand in to the officer.

i feel kinda stun and confused now.

30k for 3 years course (6 semester) each semester 4.5k

but i need to return all the money in a length of 15 years.

its kinda long...

but what stuns me the most is that it's like everything

came into me in the same time frame...

make me feel tension...

i start to feel such a way even doing such a small thing for adults i will also feel so stressed out.

what i scare is that i didn't handle all these things with care.

which i scare that will do stupid mistake... =(

i felt a bit useless even doing such little task such as preparing the ptptn loan document and my studies only... while in future how the hell am i gona handle the work loads ??!!

been listening to music with head set to actually release myself

but i think things cant work out quite well....

as most of the song is sad songs causing me to be more 'emo'

feel like shouting at something till i blank out my mind and clear up what i should do...

2AM

You Wouldn't Answer My Call

totally start to fall for this song...

x)

a word to describe it

IMBA !!!

Am i actually so hard to approach?

hard to communicate?

I actually feels that

i am invisible among peoples

where no one actually notice me,

not to even say saw me.

I'm just like a invisible man.

미안 해요

Should i be

just seat there

and

not to care about anything

not to do anything

not to talk to anyone

not to answer anything

not to bother about any things

people talk in such a way that

actually will hurt people

but seems to take it as a joke.

if i promise to

keep as secret

means its secret

lock down till bottom of my mind.

trust me

or not to trust me

beyond you.

reflection on my secondary school,

SMJK Sam Tet @ Ipoh.

been studying at this school of mine for 5 years from form 1 till form 5

where i graduate on the year 2008. now it's 2010.

it's been 2 years.

when i think back about my secondary school life,

it was so fresh that i still remember how i pass every day on my schooling days,

meet up with friends and buddies which is different class.

from the 5 years in the school, what i think the most happening period is the time on 2008,

which is the year when i am studying form 5.

first of all from me, is that me and my friends are going to sit for the SPM

and decide where to study in future.

other than that not to miss out what our principle did to upgrade our school.

to think back that i 'm not enough mature on how things goes in the real world but now i think i do need to say how grateful is our principle in doing so much things in a short period of 1 YEAR !

few things such as, being the first secondary school that start using card system to take attendance in peninsular Malaysia? how cool, when think back... =)

second is that installing air-conditioner to our hall, which had no air-conditioner last time.

third is to had a major project on expanding the library and teachers office.

forth, by making our 2 basketball court to be covered =)

from second to forth listed, all the money came from students, students parent, public and private sector. but also no from GOVERNMENT ! how sad to actually reminds me back how sux the government is.

fifth, is to got sponsor from MCA and also some sponsor from others to build a bridge for us to walk across to the other side of it as the road is so freaking busy. about this i felt a shame of government that not doing such a tiny thing ?? to actually ensure the student safety...? but we all do know the reasons on why they didn't. curious?

i think thats all i can think and can write about in here.

while i got to rush for my stuff to do for my classes.

ps: i had no intention of flaming government or any sector, if u are not happy with it u can not to read about this blog tq.

reasons on

Typically there is few reason that i think why i'm still single,

first reason is that i'm not as handsome as most of those people out there... =X

second is that i'm not good in talking or flirting...

third, not as smart of most of them.... 0,..,0

forth, not as wealthy as others...

fifth, i don't talk with unknown people???

sixth, due to the background of my family or how i was thought??

seventh, doesn't have the confidence in own self to speak out.

eight, due to my stingy personality? =7

ninth, because i'm a nerd... ? O_O

tenth, is it because i'm hard to approach ?!?!

hmm, basically that what i thought for my self...

or most probably there is more reasons behind... =[

What a interesting and tired day in Uni,

though class started by 10am, but it ended at 6pm.

=3

what is interesting about today was

economics tutorial, that just conducted 1st time after 3 weeks... O___O

the very last group that is catching up from behind, =(

but got to meet up this cool tutor

though 1st impression on him was a like not very well, as in meet him the 1st time by a mistake that he got into the wrong class that is into my class while not his tutorial,

while now, judging from what i heard him said and his experience,

i think i will be enjoying the tutorial for econs for this whole term 1 and term 2,

one thing that isn't cool about him is that, he kept on repeating same thing as to give strong perspective on the basic of econs and also key words to be used in writing essay or answer out.

second was about got to register a 'wong kok' member card that last for 5 years for FOC... x) kinda cool for this....i know, most probably most of u guys got it, but i just got it..so i consider it as cool for me.. =)

another thing was about a tall girl, that is a korean girl,

her height was like almost the height of mine...

too bad that i don't know who she...

meanwhile, today i only notice the 3 Nike shoes that i own had the same swoosh pattern as in the swoosh goes all the way till the back of the shoes and connected... x)

if ur not sure about what i said, most probably going to upload a photo of it if i got the time and also a camera, that sadly is that i don't own a camera... =((

wooosh ~

lousy blog i had

as in

it seems like i am

writing a

dairy here...

do skip this post, if u had no interest in about my personal. tq.

Is good to see how friends taking a step forward ahead changing and walking toward brighter path,

how i wish i could step forward even 1 single little step...

but no matter how hard i try, i still fail...

because of something happen way back before when i was in primary school days,

i lost myself by that day by wearing another mask in daily life

no meeting or talk to much people around me

or even i talk but many things are locked...

in such a way that i don't really share any secrets to anyone,

i meant everyone... but all lock behind the history of memories.

till secondary school, where i found a group of friends that i can approach with,

but somehow there isn't the trust in between that i can't feel it.

still, i do believe we are still buddies but not as simple as friends...

though now u guys were all in Ipoh and Kampar while i am the only 1 that is at KL.

as now i do feel the gap in between us, as less communicate.

as i am saying that i wore a mask at primary school to hide my main personality,

but i kept on wearing on mask on above...

that till now, that i can't even know actually whats my true personality

i felt so random...

i can push or to give positive advice to friend around me,

but why is it that i am the one that had all those negative thought roaming in my mind, every sec in my life... i tried to think so positively and speak so positively but somehow the confidence is not there.

i just had no idea now...

had no how to proceed for now until i really do fight won against the 'object' that is seal so deeply that i can't even remember of how it happen and how it ended.

meanwhile, i do feel like there is a gap between me and people around me.

i do hope to know about something,

that is about, is it hard to approach to me??

it can be talk to me, saying hi... or what so ever that it is related to it.... do drop a comment or send me a e-mail or tell in msn. if u are my friend that is reading about this.

found this by being shared by some

it's actually very awesome...

do spare less than 7 min

on listening to this.

awesome right??? =)

0:08 SHINee – Lucifer 0:26 SHINee – Ring Ding Dong0:39 Super Junior – Bonamana 0:53 U-Kiss – Man Man Ha Ni 1:06 T-ara – I Go Crazy Because Of You1:21 BEAST – Shock 1:35 Big Bang – Haru Haru 1:47FT Island – I Hope 2:16 Wonder Girls – 2 Different Tears 2:42 BEAST – Mystery 2:55 4Minute – HUH 3:07T-ara – Bo Peep Bo Peep 3:18 KISS – Because I’m A Girl 3:51 2AM – I Will Never Let You Go Even If I Die4:20 DBSK – I Believe 4:52 SNSD – Gee

something came into me when i'm bathing,

but when i wanted to blog it out here,

i forgotten about what i wanted to blog about,

and i think i going to pause here and think... think... think back...

finally i'm able to think back of what i wanted to blog about.

it's about my university. x)

as i had mention, that i just started my degree not long ago while its only 3 weeks now...

but so far, i feel the stress from the study load and course work,

though i am not about to talk about all those,

is that i feel like i'm not in a lecture hall anymore when i enter the degree compare to my foundation,

what i see is that all those branded stuff that student had in their body...

for instance, hand bag... some brands that i started to feel bored to looking at,

such as Longchamp, Burberry, Chanel, LV and some more others.

it's seems like that it's so must to own them even their still students.

i'm not jealous or what, is that i am curious to know why only.. =)

for me, i purely just think that their family background are rich, thats all..

though i think this is very common in overseas...

i always told my friend to be more confident in them selves

but the fact is that i don't even have any confident in myself

there is always people who stand out and say out what their thought and their opinion,

but i rather silent up and stay there to just listen on what other say about

this is mainly because i think that i don't have the enough knowledge to actually said out what i thought, while this term 1

there is a course named MOB, management and organization behavior,

there is 4 stage of knowing,

one of the knowing is 'independent knowing' where it is the third stage.

i don't think so i can stand up and share my opinion though knowledge is uncertain,

it's because that i scare of what other think about me.

other than that, in the forth stage that is the 'contextual knowing'

it stated that knowledge is contextual as in we need evidence in which we had stated.

while i can't actually recall things such as who said it and where did i found it...

so it's really quite hard to speak out and also i am not sure of the full text of it due to my bad memory....

... ...

lolx for the blabling~

team building

attend for the

team building event for UWE student,

though actually not all attend,

while some just left after attendance or left middle of it.

starting was like feel like skipping it too,

but after playing, i think it's quite unexpected to be fun and cool.

that work with people that i don't really know, but only 1 people that i know since we study foundation together and same class, where other's just meet by that moment.

it's quite fun actually to run up and downs, left and right... though is tiring.

but i had not had such a none stop run here and there for a while...

the event started around 10:15am, and for my group we finished it around 4pm

which complete the whole game set in number 5 in term of speed. while had no idea about the score yet.

as i left to catch the bus and did not stay back to listen to whose the winner and stuff...

overall, it's not that bad as i thought.

mean while, starts from tomorrow i got to start doing my tutorials and also assessments...

do hope i do able to cope with it.

i think this is

happening to me

just started my

degree life for around 2 weeks time?

and by looking at the

subject's handbook,

there are so many of individual assignments

queuing up.

imagine 6 subject

but i do know that i can't compare it with

working people or people studying for PHD

hope i just manage to cope with it

and do my best to handle all.

while i also do hope that the internet

i using can be slightly

better?

as in for me to download

journal's??

pls~~ T__T

Words

can be a seed

that plant within

mentally.

Good and supportive word will

push our mentally strength

upwards.

Negative words will

drag our mentally strength

downwards.

All i need

is just a slightly

push from behind

so i can really stand on

on my decision

that step into this course.

Finally can't bear it

went to visit the doctor by yesterday

about my nose...

what he told me is that,

"your nose had a very serious sinus"

and he gave me 3 types of medicine

but got to like eat finish it and go back for a second visit by november.

Aiks... hope it really to recover soon... T__T

while,

for my course,

i think i got my self into group 3

i think...

at least there isn't 8am class...

but, 2 days classes till 6pm

wondering who will i meet on monday tutorial class...

other than that,

i'm quite worried about

why am i not receiving the e-mail from UWE yet,

while others got theirs. hope i do receive it asap...

~o~

got to off soon and pack my stuff and hurried for 1:45 pm KTM back to KL.

got this video clip

shared by my best friend

Raymond Lee

the song below is truly

meaningful,

if u know cantonese

will be best to listen to it.

spare just that 4 min...

and you understand what i said.

swimming

For quite a time

that i had no swim

and

today

went swimming with my sis

totally crappy...

as only 10 laps,

i lost my breath and no more energy

==||

haiz...

Month of

October,

i had no good feelings about this month

as

the 1st day of October,

got some misunderstand

within me and the apartment owner,

causing me

feel like moving out

and find a better 1.

as today,

when i woke up,

i don't feel great,

my heads are heavy...

head ache from morning till now,

it's like those blood vein

going to burst any time.

hope that

tomorrow orientation

will be a better day.

cross finger that everything

just goes smoothly for these time.

my orientation

is gona start by tomorrow

kinda nervous

hope everything works out nicely

back to my rented house,

no streamyx =/

means line damn slow with p1

so unstable compare to the

time before i end my foundation.

hope it goes better soon...